Injury – there’s a dirty word to any athlete! And I personally think we ultra runners tend to push the envelope more than the average runner. Our brain processes something doesn’t feel quite right, but if we do this stretch or take just a little time off, “it” will sort itself out and the world will be right again.
I’ve been in the sport of ultra running for 6 years now and I LOVE it. I have worked very hard to go from the back to the middle pack. Middle is where the party is! I have met some amazing people along this journey. I volunteer where/when I can. I am that runner who is always talking to a “roadie” to come give the trails a try. But somewhere along the way we moved from rainbows and unicorns to cloudy days and dragons in the shape of an injury which I did not want to acknowledge until I took a good spill at an ultra up in North Texas I had no business of doing.
Raise your hand if ever you have ever fallen out of love or found yourself plodding along in the sport you love? That somewhere along the journey, the romance wore off, things were just a bit less shiny. In my journey I have been an ambassador for several companies, having some fantastic opportunities and being with incredible team mates. But the training and racing became work. I wore these more like a badge of honor than acknowledging what was really going on. My mental muscle, which was always my strongest aspect of running, had moved out. And in ultras, we all know the mental muscle is just as important as the physical.
I tried everything from mid-November to the first of December last year before seeking out a doctor. I went the untraditional way and elected red light therapy. There was a lot of work (at home PT, extreme modification with CrossFit, et. Al.) that I had to do in conjunction with the red-light therapy. Oh, did I mention no running, like none whatsoever, for two (2) weeks. When I did have the clearance to start again, no more than maybe 5 to 7 miles a week. It was frustrating, humbling and made me realize how bad I wanted to run – to feel all the feelings you have in training and on race day. Some races are great, but I bet if you are reading this, you have that one ultra that never seemed to end – where you wanted off, but the ride just kept going.
Fast forward to Jackalope Jam 48hr in February. Yep, if you are counting on your fingers that is roughly 3 months. The 48 hour saw me start with only 24 miles of collective running. I was only cleared to do the 100k, but it had to be more walking than running. I had to take extra breaks, treat the knee as needed. The knee was the boss, not me. I think some runners would have elected not to race or been stressed. This runner was EXCITED and grateful to be out there. It was like my first ultra all over again. I was out there for me, for a company that took me from ambassador to competitor, for those who want to do this sport but can’t and for so many more reasons.
If you are reading this, and this is you, breathe it all in. That joy you felt can be found again. You can find yourself in an injury and come out the other side a completely different athlete. I am not the runner I was pre-injury (I’m still healing as of this blog), but I am okay with that because I found myself along the way again. There are injuries where you can bounce back to who you were pre-injury. At 48, though, I had to meet my body where it was at and build it, literally, again. That, there, is the finding. Just like in an ultra, you have a decision to make. Keep moving forward or quit.
Let me leave you with an excerpt from a poem I wrote. Print them out and keep close to you if you are on or facing the journey of healing, self-discovery, whatever it may be that finds your feet in the ultra-world.
“…Dreaming the dream of that finish line…around the bend,
Into the straightaway running towards the crowd.
My lungs full to bursting, mind processing the end but not yet.
Chasing down that clock, raising my hands high.
My heart full, my legs tired, my mind wide open of seeing my dream.
I dared to dream the dream of runners…and set my soul free.”
